Well, Hello again..... Its been awhile since we talked.
I feel likes its been ages, years have gone by since I opened up my laptop and tapped on my keyboard to share some things with you.
Where have I been? Honestly Ive been caught up with life, Mom life, wife life and just life in general. My brain has been all jumbled up with so many thoughts & ides to share with you but they have been over seen by those of life! Truly all I wanna do is go on vacation or go somewhere I can scream on the top of my lungs & let it all out, the frustration, the feeling of overwhelm and a little bit of sadness that has been consuming me.
As I am typing this very moment I can feel a little bit of everything come over me, I feel lost in all the emotions, should I ask (better said can I ask for a little break?) Can I step away to gather my thoughts & emotions in sync? As quickly as I feel I can guilt steps in; Nope you gotta be there, they need you. I love my family, I love being a wife, I can remember at a young age wanting to be a good wife, great mom & a supporter of my family but that does mean I loose the sense of who I am?
Who is Jessica? Do i just respond to Mom and/or wife now?
If it makes any sense I feel like I lost but also gained so much, My life is filled with so much joy, love and experiences that Ive never thought possible. I love my life, my family and the all that has come with this new life.
But (Yes there is a but) I wanna refund myself, I want to rekindle my Jessica candle, Jessica the person, not the wife, not mom but just Jessica. To be focus on bringing myself back to life, so i can not only be a better me but also a better person to continue supporting & taking care of those I love.